drum-roll, please

Okay, everyone, Judah gets weighed today.  Thanks to those who have prayed.  I'm anxious--I definitely want to see a bigger number today!  Joey and I think he's chubbed up somewhat, but I don't know if we see it because it's actually there, or because that's what we desire most in the world right now.  I'll keep you posted.

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{update}
The results are better, but still not the best.  He only gained 3 ounces (but I don't necessarily trust the scale), which is about half of what he should be gaining.  Now I have to actually devote 99% of my time to breast feeding.  As in my baby, who takes 1 hour to eat, needs to be fed every 2 hours.  And nap times need to fit in there somehow.  And I won't let myself nurse him to sleep.  And he needs time to be stimulated by yours truly.  So, I hope husby is willing to cook and be content with myriads of dust-bunnies dust-cats, because life is nearly going to go on hold for a little while.

You know what? I'm starting to get really worn down by the bajillion different "proper" ways to raise my child.  I don't even know what I'm supposed to do anymore.

The scary thing is that I'm starting to lose faith. I don't want that.  I want to keep trusting God because I am convinced that He is the only one that actually knows the perfect parenting process.  I need to trust in Him continually.

Prayers appreciated.