a pox on impatience!

Dear friends,

I have decided that I am no longer going to worry about when this baby will show up. I've made predictions. I've contemplated trying every natural labour induction myth I've heard of. I've even become "jumpy" at every little new sensation. All of it is doing nothing to prepare my body for labour.

Because this is my second pregnancy, things are likely to look different than I expect based upon my first birth. For one thing, it's common for a second labour/delivery to take half the time the first one did. With Judah it was 11 hours (from active labour to the end). I am trying to wrap my mind around a mere 5.5 hours of labour. I find I cannot.

Another difference lies in how the baby engages in the pelvis. Whereas in a woman's first pregnancy, the baby usually makes one grand decent and then stays down until delivery (and this can happen days before labour actually begins), in subsequent pregnancies the baby is likely to drop several times, only to pop back up again. I have felt this to be the case from the sensations of I AM TOTALLY SITTING ON THE BABY'S HEAD RIGHT NOW to the cursed INSANE HEARTBURN OF DEATH - and back again. In other words, there's no telling when baby will come based upon how low s/he is sitting.

I do not want to become impatient. I have realized that there are mere days left in this time of us being a family of three. Things are going to be much busier after Nutmeg comes. Judah will be adjusting (hopefully well) to big brotherhood. Joey and I will be back to getting little to no sleep at night. I can't expect that this transition will be easy. Maybe I should just relax and wait this whole thing out without fretting or longing to speed baby's coming. I've also noted that impatience and over-thinking do nothing to help (and often minimize the likelihood of) a natural birth.

So, that's it. I'm am strictly forbidden from being impatient. God is much more aware of what's going on inside of me than I am. I think it would be wise to wait on Him.